I'm the dad of four amazing kids. I'm a husband, relationship coach, writer, photographer and part time chef. To say things get hectic would be an understatement.
Most everyone can identify with that. We've all had those days where everything seems to be happening at once. All these events and distractions vying for our time and attention.
How do we keep from exploding?
I've been called a "Zen master" more than once. In fact, my ex wife would say I don't worry about anything. It's not true, but she tends to think so. Regardless, I have come to understand some things, and adapt other things to keep my cool. It's not easy, but it works.
First and foremost, I know God is in control.
Yes, I believe in God. You can believe what you want, but for me personally, it comforts me a great deal to know that a) my heavenly Father loves me completely, b) He wants the best for me, and c) He knows not only everything that ever will happen, but also everything that ever could happen.
This understanding allows me to view every circumstance that arises as an opportunity to learn a lesson and grow closer to God himself. It means there is a plan underneath all the chaos.
I've been fired from one job only to land a better one. I've been through a divorce, but come out on the other side (several years later) as a more caring partner. There's been so many times when circumstances look horrible on the surface, but it's turned out to be a greater blessing than I could've imagined.
Second, I live by principle rather than feeling. Nothing adds to the crazy like not having a plan. Living by feeling is like trying to balance a glass of water on a football. Set principles in place before life gets hectic, so when they storms come there's less decisions to be made. Having guiding principles in place give you direction.
Feelings change like the weather. They're great for enjoying life but not so much for making decisions; especially so in upsetting circumstances.
Third, I remember something my friend told me when his girlfriend had a cervical cancer scare. He said, "This too will pass."
Circumstances don't last forever. Problems don't last forever (unless they're ignored). It's important to remember this truth when things get overwhelming. There is a solution and it will be found.
Nothing you're going through right now is going to be the end of your life. You will get through this and come out better on the other side. I say this with confidence, and not as a coach. I say this as a person who's been to rock bottom before. I've had to start over with next to nothing more times than I care to count.
Trust me on this one… You'll make it through.
Keep your peace. Even if you don't believe in God, you can still have guiding principles and a strong constitution to bring you through trials without losing your head. You didn't come this far just to come this far.
Jon Newton is TheRapportCoach. He teaches people how to use the neuroscience behind relationships to create extraordinary experiences between humans. From personal to business relationships, Jon helps humans navigate humanity.